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Thursday, December 01, 2011

Time travel and the large Hadron Collider

I suppose it was inevitable that the Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland would start to attract the more eccentric members of society, however I cannot say that I expected time travellers.

According to this piece a would-be saboteur has been arrested at the Large Hadron Collider. Eloi Cole, who is described as a strangely dressed young man, said that he had travelled back in time to prevent the LHC from destroying the world:

The LHC successfully collided particles at record force earlier this week, a milestone Mr Cole was attempting to disrupt by stopping supplies of Mountain Dew to the experiment's vending machines. He also claimed responsibility for the infamous baguette sabotage in November last year.

Mr Cole was seized by Swiss police after CERN security guards spotted him rooting around in bins. He explained that he was looking for fuel for his 'time machine power unit', a device that resembled a kitchen blender.

Police said Mr Cole, who was wearing a bow tie and rather too much tweed for his age, would not reveal his country of origin. "Countries do not exist where I am from. The discovery of the Higgs boson led to limitless power, the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening."

The report says that Mr Cole was taken to a secure mental health facility in Geneva but later disappeared from his cell. You could not make it up, or could you?
I take it you didn't notice the date of the piece and the additional comment.
Yes, I did, hence the very last comment on the blog piece.
Also, the name "eloi" was a bit of a give-away to anyone familiar with the works of HG Wells.
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